


" I don't think that its..."

by PinkHitman



Category: Voltron: Defender of the Universe, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Original Song, SO SORRY, headcannon, plots all over the place, they bond over music, this is a freaking mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 13:33:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7575880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkHitman/pseuds/PinkHitman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I really think that I can reach you<br/>You somehow made it all the way to mars<br/>And the stars<br/>In your eyes, they complete you<br/>I want to reach them<br/>But I think it’s all too far..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	" I don't think that its..."

It had all started, with the guitar. 

Not the times his father would play to him while his mother would sing, soon teaching him to join in. Not the time he picked it up in highschool because chicks dig musicians, and this particularly good looking goth chick happened to think guitars were hot. Not even the hundreds of times he would sneak out to the roof of one of the buildings at the Garrison to play away his frustrations at another failure. No. It was a new moment. A new guitar.

The team had decided to properly document their travels, Shiro insisting they all keep a Journal and a standard system to keep track of the days. This lead to Pidge making everyone an ‘earth clock’ and seeing how they had forgotten what day it was currently on earth, the celebrated a new year. 

This lead to birthdays. Lance, being the beautiful wild child that he was, was born in July. For that day the team had really pulled through. What Lance had wanted most, was to go home. He had let this slip to Keith one night after training and Keith had taken this information to Hunk. Who, against bro code, spilt some nasty jass about Lance’s usual habits to keep his family close while he had been at the Garrison. That included music.

The whole team had worked together to make Lance an acoustic guitar like the one his father had. Pidge had designed the specks and worked with Coran and Allura to find a planet with necessary materials. While Keith kept Lance busy with training, Shiro and Hulk scouted out on a few different planet stops for what they needed, and then Hulk designed some tools to help with building and working with said materials. Lastly, Keith had put it all together and done his best to carve a Blue Lion on the front. The material they had found close enough to wood was like it in almost every way, except it was a bit more durable, which meant harder to work with initially, and it had jagged streaks of brilliant blue across its polished brown surface. It looked almost like raw mineral deposits on a cave wall. Lance had decided upon seeing it, it reminded him brilliant blue rivers from earth. 

So Lance had his guitar. For once it was a way which he found he could lighten the mood without being obnoxious, which was a plus for everyone. His first attempts had evolved trying to woo Alora, but she was far more interested in the guitar itself then the boy playing it. After causing some headache inducing noise, she handed it back to lance who allowed his fingers to find their place and began quietly strumming a song from his childhood. 

He did this often enough now, including his singing voice, which got a surprising amount of praise. Even from Keith, who had also picked up guitar at some point. 

Keith had expressed a lack of creativity that was hardly news to Lance. The boy was an ace if you told him where to fly and he could even figure out new ways to get there, which was a kind of creativity. It had opened up something new between them.

Sure, they had bonded before the guitar. They would talk about missions and planets and home. Lance talked more, he figured Keith just liked something to listen too, so long as Lance wasn’t being too annoying about it. Most of their shared interest, like flying, were touchy subjects. But it turns out the guitar opened this new relaxed state between them. Sure they bickered, but Lance could pull back and shut up as often as Keith would listen and try to contribute. They would now spend several nights in Lance's room, playing with the guitar, trading it back and forth, Lance singing. 

Lance had even joked that when they return they should start a Band. Lance would sing and play guitar, obviously. Keith, who was decent enough could also play guitar. Shiro on base, Hulk on drums, Pidge on keyboard and remixing. Keith agreed. Which was a first, usually Keith just wouldn’t object, or outright ignore Lances wild ideas, but this time he had said ‘sure.’ That… That was commitment. 

That is what led him wondering to Allura as she worked, Coran was a bit too much for the subject plaguing his mind, and he had laid off the flirting enough that Allura didn’t immediately roll her eyes when he approached her.

“ Hey, Princess?”

“ Yes, What is it?” Her gaze was focused on her work, Lance looked over it too, she was trying to decode nearby distress signals to see when they had activated; some they had found were already destroyed. This was to save time but it was hard work and more than depressing to see how much has already been far lost to this war.

“ I was just wondering, about past paladins?”

“ What about them?”

“ A few things I guess,” Lance took a seat behind her. Focusing his eyes on the hundreds of coordinates in the small stretch of sky she was focused on. “How.. how many came before us?”

“ Hundreds.”

“ What!? Hundreds?”

“ Yes well, we had many at all times willing to stand in the place of a fallen Paladin. This castle was not just for royalty, it was a home to many willing to give their lives and full focus to the pursuit of peace.” She answered simply.

“ Ri-Right.” Lance let his mind wander over that fact. “ So, it might be possible two Paladins wound up together?”

“ Together?”

“ In a romantic way.”

Allura had stopped working, turning around she looked over with a cold disgusted glance, and Lance felt his stomach drop like a lead weight.

“ I..” She paused, clearly trying and failing to hide the accusation in her voice. “ I hope you are not seeking a relationship with our young, sweet, Pidge.”

“ What?!” Lance felt panic sink in. “ NO! No, no, no, nonononono. Pidge is like a brother to me. Well sibling, whatever. I’m just wondering on a hypothetical. I mean the lions are not necessarily picky when it comes to gender? Or aliens?”

Allura had stopped her work, now giving the conversation her full attention. She seemed deep in thought.

“ Well, there was a story, on Altea; a kind of… saying? The lions take Paladins that reflect who they are, so in a way it is a good guide to one’s heart and the hearts of others. There was one specific saying though, that ‘ only the sea can keep the sun.’” 

Lance raised an eyebrow. What did that have to do with anything?

Allura must have sensed his trouble in understanding and sat next to him.

“ There are two lions that are said to be, what I believe you refer to as ‘soul mates’ the guardian of fire and guardian of water. Red and Blue.”

Lance felt something crawl up his neck, a blazing heat he could not shake. He attempted to train his focus on the hologram, trying his best to seem uninterested, unfazed and unshaken.

“ Why them?”

“ Well, I suppose I never explained your lion to you. The Blue lion is trusting, loyal, and loving. It is that loyalty that drives a support of his team as a leg. This, however, does not mean that the blue lion picks anyone.” 

It was as if she had read his mind, because she had added that last fact just as Lance was about to voice his concerns. Still, Loyalty wasn’t bad.

“ The blue lion looks for someone who can reflect these traits, it is your trust in others and your lion that makes you rare and the second hardest paladin to find. Your heart cannot waver.”

Lance stayed quiet, nodding for her to continue.

“ The red lion is the opposite, and it was said often that red paladin’s let very few into their heart. Blue, being so trusting and loyal was often patient with red. This, on Altea, was a bit of a classic romance. Paladin or not, “ only the sea can keep the sun.” 

“ Oh… so it’s kinda like… Ying and Yang?” 

“ What?”

“ Its this Chinese symbol or something, here.” He takes Allura’s hand and gently traced the pattern of the symbol.

“ I uh… guess it doesn't work without color. One half is darkness and the other is light? They work together in harmony.” Allura looked at lance astonished. 

“ Yes, in a way. Very interesting.” She held her palm at eye level, trying to understand and imagine the shape. “ Earth is so very interesting.”

Lance had let his mind wander, it suited them, the dumb cheese ‘Ying Yang’ deal. He felt his cheeks flush and he stood abruptly. 

“ Thanks princess. I’ll… let you get back to it.”

“ You’re welcome Lance.” She said looking up. She must have noticed Lances stiff posture because as he was leaving she added. “ It’s not necessary romantic, that bond, and it doesn’t always happen. The bond as paladins among the five of you is more than enough for most. Try not to dwell on it too much.”

Lance nodded and flashed her a smile before heading out. 

He had began making his way to his room when he spotted Keith, charring his guitar. 

“ Hey Keith!”

Keith froze, turning around. 

“ Where ya goin’ buddy?” Lance approached him, Keith seemed off, it wasn’t the first time Keith had gone into Lance’s room to retrieve the gift. He would usually go find Lance and the two would chill somewhere off in the castle. Keith seemed just as fond of the guitar as Lance, and when Keith’s own birthday came around there had been a discussion to get Keith one as well. Lance selfishly squashed it, proclaiming he would share. 

“ Mind if I join you?”

“ Uh…” Keith looked over Lance's shoulder, he then looked down at the guitar.

“ I uhh.. Decided I was to tired, so I was gonna go put it back. Here.” 

Keith handed it over and Lance tried his best to not seem disappointed. Holding it, watching Keith leave he thought back to that shy look Keith had as he had looked behind Lance. Had he heard? Lance felt his cheeks flair.

 

Dammit.

 

Lance didn’t return to his room, he found a familiar small pocket of castle that he and Keith often returned to late at night. His guitar sat loose in his lap as he gazed at the stars. 

There was really only one thing to do.

He pulled up his personal computer on the window display and began recording.

“ Space Date, uhhh.. September fifth, year one. Frustrated as all get out about damn bro bonding or whatever. Maybe the space is getting to my head but I… ugh I don’t know. Alura told me my Lion reflex loyalty and trust and love. It’s weird knowing that now, probably why I keep putting myself in danger to protect others. I’ll have to keep that in mind for the future when I argue with Keith about it. He’s reckless, and I’m loyal. 

“ Gonna try to sing my feelings, maybe something will come out of it….

 

“ You know it’s hard to even catch you,  
You know you’re always leaving me in the dust  
And I trust  
That if I dare to try to call you  
That you’d remember me but  
Maybe I trust too much 

This sensation of admiration is breaking me  
Cause’ hates to strong to belong here  
It’s positivity  
My mind fights all night to bring these feelings to light  
Getting afraid of  
I don’t think that its…”

 

Weeks pass, and Keith, though still seeming a bit more distance, is acting manageable; at least in Lance’s opinion. They still spar and hang out, but when they are at dinner with everyone Keith looks tense, and when they are alone Keith seems as though he wants to ask something.

But Lance doesn’t push it. After all, if it has any relation to the conversation he had with Allura, he’d rather not. So they pushed through.

It’s not long before they see some action. The Galra had all but taken over a small system of planets. Each planet had a crystal they used to create a barrier around that area of space. The Galra had years ago infiltrated and used it as a base, and it was time to win it back. 

Lance’s shoulder was killing him, one dumb luck Galra soldier had gotten a lucky shot and now he was struggling to make his way to Blue. His Bayard hug still formed but limp in his right hand as his left kludged at his shoulder. Keith should still be tearing ass behind him.

He looks over to see that while this is true, Keith was falling behind fast. He radios for Shiro to get a move on with back up but they are all too far. Everything was too far away. Even he was too far to get a clean shot, he could hit Keith. Should he run back, would he make it? He feels his heart lurch and suddenly he finds himself running, hands shaking. He raises his gun against the pain, he yells a battle cry to keep himself from screaming in Agony, his Bayard shifts into a long riffle and he takes aim. 

After the first shot the kickback from his gun feels like it's tearing through the wound in his shoulder. After three more he feels himself smile, hands numb but steady, each shot is a kill. Five more and he can hear Keith screaming his name while the group surrounding Keith divide some attention to Lance. Ten more and Lance passes out.

“ I really think that I can reach you  
You somehow made it all the way to mars  
And the stars  
In your eyes, they complete you  
I want to reach them  
But I think it’s all too far

This sensation of admiration is killing me  
Cause hates long gone from my head  
It’s possibilities  
My heart aches all day to keep these feelings away  
So let me pray to above  
I hope it’s not…”

 

Lance feels as though he emerged from the worst sleep ever, like one of those nights where you don’t dream. Lance feels like the fight was only seconds ago, but according to Shiro it had been days. 

Lance had woken far too many times to count from those healing pods, and each time he was still greeted by impatient yet relieved looks from everyone. This time was no different and as they hurried him off to get food he couldn’t help but feel happy they were all still this worried over him.

“ So then Keith practically Hulks out and takes out everyone in site before rushing over to you.” Pidge tells Lance excitedly. “ The three of us rushed in and picked you guys up, when we found you we thought….” the excitement faded, and worried vibes seemed to fill the room. Lance tried to move on.

“ Keith 'hulked' out? Wish I could have seen that. Hell, wish he would have done it sooner, so I didn’t have to save his rump.”

“ I would have been fine!” Keith burst out suddenly. Keith stood, rage filling his presents, towering over Lance. “ You were shot! I told you to get out, I was making my way back when you…”

“ Keith!” Shiro started. “ We saw how many guys you were up against, and you were injured enough to spend a whole day in the healing pod yourself. Lance saved your life.”

“ At risk of his own!” Keith shouted, he whipped back towards lance. “ You could have ripped your arm off with that thing!? What the hell were you firing!?”

“ My Bayard? It kinda transformed, I needed a better shot.” Lance answered but Keith glazed over it moving on.

“ You drew them right to your position! They could have taken your lion, they could have killed you right there! You cou-” Keith had hit his breaking point and Lance could see it in his eyes, behind the fury, fear. Keith, without a word, straighten himself up and left.

Lance tried to follow but Shiro just placed his hand on Lance's shoulder.

“ Let him cool off, he doesn't want to admit it, but you really did save him. It’s not a pride thing, I just don’t think he likes the idea of you risking too much for him.”

“ Why wouldn’t I, were on the same team. I’ve done it before, for most of you.”

“ Yeah,” Hunk added. “ but not for him.” 

“ Hunks right,” Pidge started “ I’m sure he felt worried but I’m not sure an independent guy like him can handle such a huge offering.”

“ Offering.”

“ You could have died,” Hulk clarified. “ To save him.”

“ Well yeah.” He answered without thought.

The room stared at him, but it was right. He would have done it for anyone, he already had, what was the big deal. Everyone was alive right.

He eventually made it back to his room, everyone had been having trouble sleeping so they had all called it an early night and dispersed. Lance picked up his guitar and headed out, it felt so oddly solid in his hand, his mind couldn't help but focus on the idea that he was still here. 

He wouldn't admit it, but he had never really considered his death before now. Sure he had gotten in a few scrapes but he had always done it on instinct. This time had been thought out, he knew his chances of surviving in once piece were small from the second he raised his gun. 

He found his usual spot and pulled up his video journal. Skipping the space date he started to sing the song he had been working on.

“You make me question  
Each hesitation  
A new frustration  
And this obligation  
An alteration  
Of my meditation  
You keep away from me.

Pretty abomination  
Annoying captivation  
My mind's imagination  
It’s destroying me.”

“ That’s a new one.”

“ KEITH!” Lance jumped spinning around. Keith was standing there, he looked so odd without his belt pouches and jacket. Lance ended the recording and set the guitar aside as Keith joined him on the floor. Nothing but the distant hum of the mechanics of the ship hung in the air for some time. Lance felt an overwhelming desire to just pick up his guitar and start playing something. But it seemed like Keith needed to say something. 

“ Don’t… just don’t do it again.” He finally said. It took Lance a moment to realize what Keith meant before he realized he meant the fight days ago.

“ Fat chance.” 

“ Why?! Why do you have to be so… stubborn?! Is this another dumb competition? Who can die first?” 

“ What? No! Dude, If you were in my shoes what would you have done?” Keith had a look of frustration paired with a pout as he looked at lance. They both knew what he would have done. 

“ You don’t get to decide what I do with my life and how I value it.”

“ You have family Lance. You need to go home and not in a pine box.”

“ You have family too, here in space! Don’t think for a second your life is somehow worth less then mine just cause I’ve got family.”

Silence filled them, but not awkward, it was like a warm bubble. To Lance everything seemed bigger for a moment. He felt huge sitting in this tiny space on a giant ship, swimming around the known universe. To him this moment was larger than life. 

Keith turned to Lance, causing Lance to jump slightly but he tried to mask it by turning to. Keith seemed focused, determined, a look Lance had seen him wear on the battlefield. Keith's gloved hand came to Lance's cheek, the odd sensation of the tips of his fingers so soft, against the rugged texture of the glove at the palm.

“ Don’t… Don’t hate me for this.” Keith whispered, and before Lance could ask what he meant, his face was turned to the window, and he felt something warm and soft on his cheeks. As the feeling held, it mixed with small puffs of hot air that sent fire across his skin and sparks down his spine as he realized each puff was in time with a movement in Keith's chest. Lance's eyes, facing the window could see the dark reflection of Keith’s face right next to his own before Keith pulled away.

“ Sorry.”

“Ahh… wa?” 

“ I.. I know you like Allura… I saw you a while back with her and I think she might.. With time… if you tone down your flirting-”

“ What!?” Lance shouted. His eyes focused on Keith’s red face and wide eyes as he searched his memory. That night.. That night!

“ You? You didn’t hear what we were talking about?”

“ What? No. I saw you too and… well I was looking for you but, you seemed busy so….”

“ And that bothered you?”

He watched Keith’s face dive into new shades of red while his face scrunched in anger. Too angry to speak even.

“ Holy shit.” Lance barked out, a wild laugh that made him suddenly feel as though he could float.

“ Wh-?!” Keith had gone on the defensive, but Lance was having none of that. He swooped down and attempted a kiss. It was, well it was awkward. Keith had been mid word and his mouth had snapped shut tight upon seeing Lances approach. Keith’s lips were so tight they puckered under. Lance had tilted his head too far and nearly missed his mouth anyway. Instead of pulling back completely for a fresh attempt, Lance made a tiny adjustment and allowed Keith to actually show his lips before he tried a slightly more delightful kiss two. 

It was as if something unseen inside him lifted, thoughts, anxieties, they melted as Keith pushed back, moving his gloved hand to the back of Lance's neck. Lance pushed harder till Keith’s head met with the floor. Lance pulled back.

“ Holy shit.” Keith whispered before Lance smirked and dove in again.

“ You know it’s just so hard to see you,

 

Your smiles seem to always tear me apart  
From the start  
I hardly left a good impression  
I guess I’m cursed, forever week at the heart

This sensation of admiration is filling me  
Cause the words to week and I’m about ready to flee  
So just think as I shove  
Something to think of  
That I’m really just in….

 

“ Wow, you wrote me a love song and didn’t even put the word love in it?” 

“ Shut up! It wasn’t a love song till you kissed me?” 

“ How does it become a love song after I kiss you? Kinda messed up. You didn’t love me till I kissed you.”

“ Of course I did!? I just, I didn’t know what it was!”

“ Right… So go on. Say it now.”

Lance was frustrated beyond belief, but he set his guitar down and moved toward Keith, winding a hand in his dark silky locks. Keith lost his smug look instantly.

“ I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This a hot mess I more or less wrote around the song. I've done it a few times where I write a song from the perspective of a character but because I'm too embarrassed to record it I usually just do this. I think its better that way. I reused some Ideas from some of my other fics that I couldn't really get to work so there might be some running ideas with my fan works.


End file.
